Monday, June 30, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
This was a busy month but it began with two very special occasions - a fabulous trial victory and my first wedding anniversary, both equally celebrated! Other things happened this month:
Vanity plate day -
A day when all I saw were vanity plates. First, I was at a red light. There was a convertible in front of me and two cars in front of her. We were all waiting to turn right. The little green arrow comes on. The cars in front of her go, but the woman in front of me will not go. No amount of honking will make her budge. In fact, when I honk, she points to the red light. I then proceed to point at and shout "green arrow." Does not help her. She must think green arrow is just some pretty sign to match the red light, like Christmas. Just as the light turns green and we FINALLY get to turn right, I notice her license plate "IM Jammin." Yes you are, honey, just at a VERY slow pace.
During the same trip I saw "Nvestg8or" - apparently NOT an undercover one and "PAID FO" which just cracked me up.
Kitchen decorations -
Someone in charge at work decided that they no longer liked the plastic forks, spoons, and knives to be in the containers facing up claiming that everyone would then touch the ends we were supposed to eat with. However, with them facing downward, no one would know what they are (despite the fact that they have been in the same positions for years). So that person made labels to put above the utensils. Well, hilarity ensued. Labels on sticky notes were EVERYWHERE - microwave, fridge, ice maker - you name it - there was a label. In fact, someone astutely labeled the sticky notes as labels. My coworker got a pic of it. If I can get it from her I will post it because it was just TOO much. Yeah, sometimes I really love TNP.
Just desserts -
Have you ever been driving down the road and something crazy happens and you think to yourself "where is a cop when you need one?" This month such thing occurred and no sooner had I thought it then a cop appeared and pulled that ass over. Never have I laughed so hard in my life. Just desserts indeed.
These are just a couple. I would be here for the next three months listing them all. No wonder I feel like I never get anything done!
So I am behind..you all can see that. To catch us up, I am going to do one post for March, April and May. Then we can get back to semi-daily posts. So, here it is - March in a nutshell:
-During a deposition when talking about diet, out came this quote:
I keep trying to turn my back on the pig, but it just keeps coming.
I almost didn't keep a straight face for that one.
-Best story for this month - at the office I decide to go and get my lunch as I was starving. I head into the kitchen and see three strangers (possibly clients) all sitting at the table. The minute I walk in, they stop in mid sentence and stare at me like *I* am intruding on *them* in the kitchen. Yeah, they do not work there. I do. It is lunch time and I am hungry. As they keep staring at me and eating our free pretzels and cheez its, I decide to leave. I find a coworker and tell the story. We go back into the kitchen where it is empty. While we are standing there, me in front of the microwave, two of them come back. The one guy then says "excuse me" to me so that he can get more free cheez its. Pretty ballsy to ask an employee of the place to move so that you can mooch some free snacks!
-We apparently have a weathergirl at the office. Someone commented about how it was raining. Weathergirl said "I don't believe it is raining. According to the puddle, it is not." How very scientific.
That's it for March folks. It was a pretty stressful month as I was getting ready for and in trial. More on that in April.