Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Crime Watch Wednesday - Don't Use Your Own Cellphone, GPS is a Bitch (Except Vicki - I Love Her)

This week's Crime Watch Wednesday is a special Mom edition. Apparently, there are wacky criminals in my Mom's hood as well and she was sweet enough to share her local paper with me. This incident serves as a warning to all would be criminals - make sure you don't use your own cell phone in the commission of a crime.

A man was arrested shortly after robbing a pizza delivery guy. The police were able to find the suspect so quickly because he used his own cell phone to order the pizza. Oh, and then they just tracked him directly to his house where he admitted he was guilty.

I bet the pizza wasn't even cold.

Seriously. He apparently had the good sense to not have the pizza delivered to his house, but didn't think twice about using his CELL PHONE, you know that thing that runs on towers with signals and tracking, to order the pizza? Sadly, the article did not give the exact details of the crime. Happily, I am willing to recreate it for you:

Criminal: Yeah, I'd like to order a small pizza. Just cheese.
Pizza place: That'll be $5.00. Would you like that delivered?
Criminal: Yep, bring it right away. Also, I need you to bring a lot of change. I only have a $50 bill...I mean a $100...I mean a $200 bill. Yeah, bring a lot of change.
Pizza place: Um, okay.

{An hour later even though it was supposed to be 30 minutes or less}

Pizza man: Here is your small cheese pizza.
Criminal: Gimme all your money sucka!
Criminal: I know you have at least $200
Pizza man: I have $20.
Criminal: Whatever sucka

{Five minutes later at criminal's residence}

Police: You are under arrest.
Criminal: How did you know it was me?
Police: We traced the number you used to order the pizza and you were here.
Criminal: You got me copper! I confess.

GPS* - leading people around the world and stopping criminals in their tracks. GPS rocks. Especially Vicky. Is she still listening?



*I don't even know if GPS is what is used to track a cellphone, but I bet it is. Vicky is too wise to not be used for such important functions as catching criminals.**

**Seriously, is she still listening?

4 important things being said:

Jennifer said...

People are so so so stupid. I am amazed.

*~Dani~* said...

Jennifer - it really is quite amazing, isn't it?

Living Dees Life said...

i've used the gps on my cellphone twice to help the police get to my location because of witnessing car accidents

*~Dani~* said...

Blaez - that was very brilliant of you! Although it begs the question, everytime I call about an accident, I get the third degree about "where exactly are you?" Maybe next time I will shout GPS it Bitches!!!

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