Monday, July 18, 2011

Ramblings of a Riddler...Tough Guy, Fights and an Exotic New Vegetable

I saw a guy walking two dogs and holding their leashes out in a way that suggests he was walking two huge and powerful dogs. The way you see tough guys walk pitbulls. He was walking two golden retrievers. Two fat ones. In fact, they weren't really even walking, but strolling.  Represent dude.

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Overheard my elderly neighbor asking his wife "is lunchtime critical?" because he still had yard work to do. Meanwhile, I have no idea when B eats lunch, what he eats or if he even eats.

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I got into a fight with a pop can today. Guess who won?  Maybe B was on to something when he tied the bag containing the pop cans closed. Unfortunately, I don't think even he could have predicted that I would untie the bag, decide to carry it on my shoulder, and then throw it over my shoulder only to land on the ground. Nor could I have predicted that just as I thought "why aren't these cans exploding" and reached down to corral them, one would explode and spray all over me. Luckily I was just back from court and not going to court.

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Today was car accident day. I saw two. The first one I was actually a responder to and let the guy sit in my car until EMS arrived. Everyone else just drove around him. The second involved a motorcyclist that I am eternally grateful I was not the first responder to, although it looked like he was alive when I passed. Similarly, my brother stumbled on to an accident and stopped to help and then passed two more.  Heat melts driver's brains. That's a fact.

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I decided that they came out with a new vegetable when I wasn't looking. Broccoli. You are probably thinking that already exists. It does. However I pronounced in a way that sounded like Brach olie.  As if it were ravioli or something. Everyone laughed at me all day. I now realize it was spelled wrong - Brocolli.  Joke's on them. Yep, it is still broccoli.  Weird thing is, we were talking about peppers. Go figure.

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3 important things being said:

sprinkles said...

I feel your pain!

There's this nail place I pass by regularly. It's called Polish and for the first zillion years or so, I read it as Polish, as in the people from Poland. I wondered why they'd call it that and couldn't figure out what people from Poland had to do with nails. And then one day, out of the blue, it suddenly occured to me that it's pronounced Polish, as in fingernail polish!

Chris - your favorite cousin said...

Spelling is not my strong suit so i pass no judgement. Hell, I didn't even know it was wrong.

*~Dani~* said...

sprinkles - I would automatically read it as Polish too. Hilarious!

Chris - I feel like I cannot even tell anymore which one is spelled right.

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