Okay, I will readily admit I am not a lyrical genius. Hell, I didn't even realize that Cyndi Lauper's song "She Bop" was about masturbation until I was an adult. An adult! I honestly have no clue what I thought it was about before that, bopping to music?
However, over time, I really started paying attention to lyrics. Maybe it is the hidden 14 year old in me still writing poetry. Or maybe it is the budding writer in me trying to find meaning in everything. Don't we all have a budding writer in us? In any event, my analysis of lyrics applies to old and new songs.
Apparently, not everyone shares this analysis. Some people, um B, take the words at face value. Kind of like me with She Pop or Olivia Newton John's "Let's Get Physical." (What do you mean that wasn't about exercising).
So the other day, B and I were driving home and listening to some vintage Prince, Little Red Corvette. Around the time of these lyrics, I start analyzing out loud:
~'Cuz you had a pocket full of horses
Trojan and some of them used~
This prompted me to say to B:
Me: Gross! Who carries used condoms in their pockets?
B: What are you talking about?
Me: Um, this song and the girl with the used condoms.
B: What makes you think she has used condoms?
Me: "you had a pocket full of horses, TROJAN and some of them USED"
B: I don't think so.
Then came these lyrics:
~I guess I shoulda closed my eyes
When you drove me to the place
where your horses run free~
Me: That's her vagina!*
B: You are crazy.
Me: Am I? What about these lyrics?
~'Cuz I felt a little ill
When I saw all the pictures
Of the jockeys that were there before me~
Me: Those are her past lovers.
B: Uh, huh.
~Move over baby, gimme the keys
I'm gonna try to tame your
little red love machine~
~Honey you got to slow down
Little red corvette
'Cuz if you don't
your gonna run little red corvette right in the ground~
Me: He is talking about AIDS.
B: NO HE IS NOT.
Me: Okay, maybe an STD.
Me: What do YOU think this song is about?
Am I wrong here ladies? Gentlemen? What is this song about in your view?
*Well, okay, it may actually have been about her bedroom, but yelling VAGINA was much more shocking.
**I still think vagina is a viable option since he was calling lovers jockeys and all.