Wednesday, June 09, 2010

Crime Watch Wednesday - The Gift that Really Isn't a Present and Also Doesn't Require Police Intervention

This week's Crime Watch Wednesday illustrates that unwanted gifts can be a "crime" at least in the victim's eyes.

A resident called the police after her recently adopted dog brought a "gift" into her kitchen in the middle of the night. Suspecting the gift was a live mouse, she trapped it under a pan, and naturally called the police. The police responded quickly. Their investigation revealed that the mouse was actually a baby bunny. They then attempted to return the bunny near the area where they believe the dog picked it up.

And this is why I don't take the dog out to pee in the middle of the night. Also, I like my sleep. Seriously, though, I am a baby. If Jersey brought me a "gift" of a mouse I would F-REAK out! There would be screaming. There would be dancing around. More screaming. Some jumping. And then probably a silent scream. You know the one? Mouth wide open, bulging eyes, no sound. Yep. That sounds about right.

You know what WOULDN'T happen? I wouldn't call the police. Somehow it would never occur to me to call the police to deal with my rat.* Oh, I also have a husband so I would probably wake him. If I didn't have a husband, I would probably call my Dad (Hi Dad - LOVE you). Or just totally abandon my house. Hell, I have been known to abandon an entire floor of the house over a bug.

Really, though, I don't know what is worse - the fact that the woman called the police or that they called this an "investigation." What did they investigate? They looked at the "rat" and saw it was a "bunny." I hope they didn't have to take a lot of notes or interview a lot of people.

The best part though is the last part. They attempted to return the bunny to the spot they thought the dog got it from. Now how in the heck would they even begin to know that? Having my own recently adopted go, I am pretty sure if I tried to get Jersey to show me where she got a rabbit she would do one of three things (1) wag her tail while attempting to lick my face, (2) pee, (3) immediately lay down and go to sleep.

I think I'll just stay inside.




*See? I have already escalated it from a mouse to rat. I am so dramatic.

Tuesday, June 08, 2010

Someone's Had a Growth Spurt Even if She Doesn't Know It

Does anyone remember this adorable little bitty puppy? The one that B snuck into my life without my permission and who instantly stole my heart and won't give it back*:



Not so little now, but still adorable, heart stealing and oh-so-cute (especially when sleeping!):


Before, she could fit in the crook of your arm taking up minimal space:


Yep. Those days are gone:





*Don't tell this to B because then he will think that he can sneak all kinds of things in the house as long as they are cute. YOU CANNOT SNEAK THINGS IN B! I HAVE EAGLE EYES.**

Monday, June 07, 2010

Pay It Forward 2: Giving Cupcakes is Fun and Again, No One Dies

In keeping with my recent Starbucks Pay It Forward Experience, I once again tried to do good and share with others. Again, this was also a result of fate. You see, there is this spot at the top of the off ramp on the freeway by our house where there is always a homeless person sitting there with a sign that says "please help. homeless and hungry." Do you know how bad you can feel, especially in the summer, when you are sitting in your nice air-conditioned car waiting at the stop light and someone is hot and hungry right next to you? Well, you can feel like a jackass.

The thing is, I rarely have any food in my car. Heck, I rarely have anything to drink either. So I never have anything to offer. B has gone and given leftover holiday food and other items to the guy before but I have never had the opportunity.

Until the other day.

It was a Friday and I was driving home from work with a paper plate full of wonderfully delicious carrot cupcakes that a coworker had brought in just for me. While stopped at the light, it suddenly dawned on me that I had something to give! So I rolled down my window and held out a cupcake. The guy immediately ran over and when he saw it was a cupcake, his eyes just lit up. I told him it was my birthday (yes useless information) and that I wanted to share my cupcakes with him. He graciously wished me a happy birthday and ran back to his place to eat his cupcake with a huge grin on his face.

And I felt good.

Sure it probably didn't cure his hunger. Sure it wasn't the healthiest thing. But it was food; fun food and probably something he didn't get very often. Hell, at that point I wouldn't have cared if he was conning me* and wasn't really homeless.

Everyone deserves a cupcake.




*My Mom, upon hearing this story, cautioned me on being conned and putting myself in danger by rolling down my window for a strange guy and that I could have been killed. All very valid points, but I try to keep at least a small semblance of faith in the human race and try to exercise caution with every action. Everyone deserves a cupcake!

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