Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Crime Watch Wednesday - Where There's Fire, There's Toast?

Toast Pictures, Images and Photos


This week's Crime Watch Wednesday proves the old adage "where there is smoke, there is fire" is totally wrong.

Police reported to the scene of a house fire to discover it was just a person that burned some toast.

I love the simplicity of this one.  The reader is left to wonder who called the police? Why did they call the police and not the fire department? Was there actually smoke or just the smell of something burning?  How did the police determine it was just toast? Did it involve breaking down doors?  I would like to believe it happened like this:

Dispatch: Officers get to 123 Lane Avenue STAT - the place is ON FIRE!
Police: We are not the fire department.
Dispatch: Don't argue with me! It is an EMERGENCY!!
Police: What are we supposed to do when we get there? Shoot the fire?
Dispatch: EMERGENCY!!!

{upon arriving at the scene}

Officer 1: I don't see a fire.
Officer 2: It smells like something is burning.
Officer 1: It smells like breakfast.
Officer 1: Mmmmm...breakfast.

{upon arriving at the front door}

Owner: Can I help you?
Officer 2: Something is burning.
Officer 1: We were told there is a fire.
Officer 2: It smells like something is burning.
Owner: Um, I burnt some toast?
Officer 1: Mmmmm....breakfast

I should totally be a movie writer. Or a sitcom writer.

True story - yesterday I got to the office and saw a huge amount of people milling around the front of the building and around the elevators. Double the amount of people you find standing there when the elevator is broke.  Somehow this only seemed mildly odd to me.  I heard rumblings of "false alarm." Then I ran into our receptionist who informed me the building had just been evacuated minutes before.  Why you ask? 

Someone burnt toast on the fifth floor.

It's an epidemic, people.  Lock up your bread!

2 important things being said:

Jennifer said...

Who determined that their was a fire anyways? Was this crime in your city? The police need to find some true criminal activity.

*~Dani~* said...

Jennifer - some nosey burnt toast smelling neighbor I would presume. There is some true criminal activity, but it is mostly boring.

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