So the last time I posted, Brad has escaped but miraculously returned the next morning like a grimy Christmas present. You will also recall that I had quite the conversation with the delivery place whom we thought were the reason for Brad's Great Escape. Turns out it wasn't so, but in the meantime a strange thing happened. Or so I thought.
After I finished yelling at the operator, she told me that she could tell me which branch delivered my package. I gave her my zip code, she told me what branch and then proceeded to tell me they don't have a phone number. I found this hard to believe but just declared "I WILL JUST GO THERE IN PERSON AND DEMAND TO SPEAK TO MY DRIVER. GOOD DAY!"
And then I didn't give it anymore thought until I came home, discovered the ripped screen and told B that I didn't think the delivery place had anything to do with it. I did not tell him, however, that while he was out searching for Brad, the delivery place drove by. He probably would have been angry that I didn't chase the driver down.
The next day after Brad was safe and sound and I was back at the office, I received a text from B indicating that the delivery place had called him and told him that they spoke to the driver who remembers seeing Brad on the catio. B told them not to worry, Brad may have been spooked, got supercat strength and busted out the screen. Not their fault. Well, not really.
Meanwhile I sat in my office perplexed. How did the delivery place know to call B? How did they get his number? When I called, I only gave them our zip code. I did not call from B's number. Hell, I didn't even call from my number. I considered this an amazing show of just HOW GOOD THEIR TRACKING COULD BE. I discussed it a lot with my coworkers and would say things like:
"How did THEY know?"
"Did they just ask EVERY driver if it saw a cat?"
"Did they just narrow down deliveries in that time frame?"
"Did they narrow down deliveries by zip code?"
"Do they have a satellite?"
"Are they watching me RIGHT NOW?"
Yes, I would look up and around the ceiling at that last one. By the time I got home I was full of conspiracy theories and thought we might have to run like Will Smith in that movie where they were tracking him all over when he mistakenly took a package in a store and the woman behind me in the theater kept gasping at "ALL OF THAT TECHNOLOGY."
So I came home prepared to tell B that we were going to have to pack light and really, how does one go on the lam with three cats and a dog, when B said:
B: What in the hell are you talking about?
Me: The delivery place! They knew to call you! I didn't give them ANY information. They have satellites. They are watching us.
Me: HOW DID THEY GET YOUR PHONE NUMBER? HOW DID THEY KNOW TO CALL?
B: I emailed them yesterday.
Me: THEY KNOW EVERYTHING WE DO!!!...wait, what?
B: I. Emailed. Them.
Me: Well, hell, why didn't you tell me that? That makes a lot more sense.
B: Doesn't it?
So the delivery place isn't watching me. Allegedly. They are still suspect. Don't worry though, I am sending Vicky after them.
On a completely different topic, watch the video below. This man's wife literally gets taken by a reindeer and he does NOTHING. He barely moves.
I would like to think if we were in the same situation, B would at least TRY to run after me. However, I may be mistaken. B's response was "reindeer are REALLY fast." Well, gee thanks. Apparently, I don't have much to worry about though as B assures me I would never be somewhere where I would have to wear a big furry parka, outside in the snow with a reindeer in the vicinity.
He is probably right. Just to be safe, I am going to get one of those kid leashes for us. If the reindeer gets me, he is coming along too. Ha!