All Through the House...Not a Creature Was Stirring...

It has been a while, so I have been informed. My time flies when you are too busy to talk about what you are doing. Now it is Christmas and almost the New Year. Maybe I will catch you up through pictures. Let's start today:

Presents I received in a forum swap

A Christmas Story wrapping paper! How cool is that?

Great gifts from the swap!!

And then there was peace.

We had a great Christmas, spending the moring with my in-laws and nephew (and the dogs) and the afternoon with my parents and the dogs. I am not sure when these girls will ever recover.  Christmas hangover indeed.

Merry Christmas,
Peace and Love,


 

Plant, Palmer, and Page: Sounds Like a Rock and Roll Band

The other day B and I were on our way to dinner with friends. B likes to listen to either (a) talk radio or (b) sports. I prefer to listen to neither. Unless it is talk radio. Then I make fun of the callers, even if I have no clue what they are talking about. B loves this.

So on this particular day, B was listening to actual sports. A football game to be exact. I did not think I was listening until I heard the announcer say "Robert Plant just fell on the field" or something like that.  This intrigued me:

Me: Did that guy just say the player's name was ROBERT PLANT?

B: Yes, but it is just his name.

Me: Well, I know.  But now all I can think of are women in black dresses and the player snapping his fingers singing "Simply Irrestible" (Note: I may have sung a verse or two here).

B: What? That's Robert Palmer not Robert Plant.

Me:  That's right. Easy mistake since they were in a band together.

B: WHAT? No they were not.

Me: Um, YES THEY WERE.

B: No. You are crazy.

Me: I am going to look it up.

Me: ...

Me: Huh. I may have been thinking about Robert Page and Robert Plant.

B: Oh. Were they in a band together or something?

Smartass.

 

It Wouldn't Be A Vacation If There Wasn't A Dog to Save

We were getting ready for our family vacation at the cottage at the lake.  Jersey was looking forward to it as we all know she loves the lake. Nevada wasn't sure what a lake was, but if Jersey likes it, she was all in.

We were supposed to go at the Fourth of July, but I had a trial that did not settle until the last minute. One vacation ruined.  This was the last time before fall sets in that we, meaning Jersey (and possibly Nevada), could get some swimming in.  So I took Thursday off to do last minute things like laundry, fix my tire, sleep in.  We were set to leave at 3:30.

Then B called me at 9.  He found a dog.  He told me I needed to find a home for it because he was a very sweet, lovable dog that he refused to take to the shelter. Sound familiar? That is how we described Nevada.

Anyway, since Nevada, I have been trolling around rescue sites and knew very well that I would never surrender a dog to the local pound, as it would probably not make it out alive unless adopted.  So I started networking and networking.

B sent me this picture:

Aren't I a pretty boy? Or should it be handsome?

How could I not want to save that face?  He looked a bit like Jersey. Then there was this picture:

And a good boy!

What a sweetie! So I started putting those two pictures on Facebook everywhere. Even my friends were reposting it.

Then B sent this one:

And a silly boy!

Blurry, but look at that sideways tongue.  How about this one:

And a goofy boy!

Yes he is upside down on someone's foot.

Most no kill shelters and rescues were full.  One awesome rescue stepped up and tried to find a babysitter for at least the time we were gone if we would foster him when we got back. They offered to pay for food, vetting, and anything else we would need including training.  

The problem was finding a babysitter.

We called in reinforcements - my brother. You may remember him from staying with Nevada for a week right after we got her because we were going to Europe. Why do these things always happen at the most inopportune times?

B took the dog for a groom and then brought him home before taking him to the vet for a check up.  First, he was LARGE.  80 lbs it turns out.  Double the size of our dogs.  In fact, our immediate neighbor came out and exclaimed, "Your dog got BIG." Um, she had just seen Jersey the day before. Those are some fast acting steroids.

Second, he was just as sweet in person:

I just want to be petted.

I named him Davison after the street that he was found by. Then during the 40 minutes I spent with him outside which mainly consisted of him flopping down on the ground next to me, rolling over, and staring into my eyes as I scratched his ears and rubbed his belly, I named him Romeo.

We introduced him to Jersey and Nevada.  Nevada decided to show her affection in a naughty way. *Ahem* oral slut *Ahem*.  Romeo wasn't neutered and he thought he would repay her with some affection of his own. Then we separated them. However, he did not mind any dogs, big or small, or even our cats that he accidentally met.

Just as my brother was on his way over, we heard from a neighbor who read about Romeo on Facebook and offered to watch him. By the time she came over to meet him, the "watching" was turning into "perhaps keeping him."  Turns out they were looking for a friend for their dog and Romeo was the right age and size.  She left with him, but not before I took this picture:

And sit pretty.

I am happy to report that Romeo, now named Gus, did great that night in his new home. The neighbors took him to be neutered and it was determined that he had heartworms. They are paying for that treatment and the vet expects him to make a full recovery.

Davison/Romeo/Gus stole everyone's hearts and B and I were so happy he found a home. We checked on him via Facebook all weekend. He even stole my brother's heart who insists that Gus will "always be Jake" to him.

Happy Tails, Gus!  

*B affectionately called this my first rescue. I think our execution needs a little help. My parents are just glad we didn't decide to add him to our brood.

Knock! Knock! Mo Fo Karma Wants Her Five Dollars Back

Sometimes karma doesn't come around until much later. So much later, in fact, that the person wishing for karma to come back around never really knows if it does. That was not the case for my friend last week.

My friend was on her way back to the office and stopped to get gas. She noticed a beat up old van with a walker visible in the window and a man that appeared to need assistance. He told her that he just got out of the hospital and needed gas money to get home.  Feeling in a caring mood, she offered him the $5 that was in her wallet. He graciously accepted it and thanked her profusely.  Before my friend could put her gas cap back on, he was gone. He did not get gas.

That got her goat.  

If she had a goat.

You know what I mean.

Karma was on duty and caused my friend to look across the street where she spotted the man's van pulling into the liquor store.

That got her goat.

See above.

She hopped in her car and went to the liquor store. She rushed inside and found the man, not even buying liquor, but buying a lotto ticket. Then it went a little something like this:

She:  Gas money? REALLY? Gas? Where's the GAS?

Man: What? It's only a lottery ticket.

She:  I want my $5 back! NOW!

The man rifled through his pockets. The cashier grinned and gave my friend a thumbs up. The man then said he must have left it in his car.

She: Oh good. Then I will just follow you out to your car to retrieve it.

Apparently, he did not think she would go through with it as when they got to his van, he pulled the $5 out of his pocket and meekly handed it to her. Then he got THE LECTURE:

She: You are what is wrong with people today! You are what makes people like me not want to give to people in need because they might get scammed by people like you!

Then she went to her office.  Still mad.

Without her goat.

Or is it with her goat?

I don't even know what that expression means. I do know that there is a man out there that might think twice before he pulls that scam again.

Or at least maybe buy his lotto ticket at the gas station.

 

P.S. The first part of my title is from The Bloggess. If you are not reading her blog, you should be. In fact, you should start with this post.

It Is Like the Movie I Am Four, But It Is Five and Someone's Not Happy

B was more than a bit dismayed to find out he is not number one in my book. My phone book that is.  It all started when I thought I accidentally butt dialed him:

Me: I think I called you by mistake.

B: I never noticed.

Me: I just know because I dialed #5.

B: Wait. I am number 5 in your phone book?

Me: Um...

B: NUMBER FIVE? 

Me: Maybe it is alphabetical?

B: WHAT? WHO DO YOU EVEN CALL?

He then started to name off all of the people I spend time with on the phone proving that he should at least be number 3.  As his look of horror and disbelief grew with each passing minute, I happened to query:

Me: Well, what number am I in your phone book?

B: ONE! YOU ARE NUMBER ONE! I PUT AN "A" IN FRONT OF YOUR NAME TO MAKE SURE YOU ARE NUMBER ONE.

Me: Huh.  That is so sweet.

B: YOU KNOW WHAT IS NOT SWEET? BEING NUMBER 5.

He then stalked off muttering something about proving your love or something.  Turns out that my contacts do not even have speed dial numbers in my new phone, so the 5 meant nothing.  I have no idea why I even thought it did.  And B is at the top of the list, although I am sure he doesn't believe me.

Ramblings of a Riddler...Tough Guy, Fights and an Exotic New Vegetable

I saw a guy walking two dogs and holding their leashes out in a way that suggests he was walking two huge and powerful dogs. The way you see tough guys walk pitbulls. He was walking two golden retrievers. Two fat ones. In fact, they weren't really even walking, but strolling.  Represent dude.

***

Overheard my elderly neighbor asking his wife "is lunchtime critical?" because he still had yard work to do. Meanwhile, I have no idea when B eats lunch, what he eats or if he even eats.

***

I got into a fight with a pop can today. Guess who won?  Maybe B was on to something when he tied the bag containing the pop cans closed. Unfortunately, I don't think even he could have predicted that I would untie the bag, decide to carry it on my shoulder, and then throw it over my shoulder only to land on the ground. Nor could I have predicted that just as I thought "why aren't these cans exploding" and reached down to corral them, one would explode and spray all over me. Luckily I was just back from court and not going to court.

***

Today was car accident day. I saw two. The first one I was actually a responder to and let the guy sit in my car until EMS arrived. Everyone else just drove around him. The second involved a motorcyclist that I am eternally grateful I was not the first responder to, although it looked like he was alive when I passed. Similarly, my brother stumbled on to an accident and stopped to help and then passed two more.  Heat melts driver's brains. That's a fact.

***

I decided that they came out with a new vegetable when I wasn't looking. Broccoli. You are probably thinking that already exists. It does. However I pronounced in a way that sounded like Brach olie.  As if it were ravioli or something. Everyone laughed at me all day. I now realize it was spelled wrong - Brocolli.  Joke's on them. Yep, it is still broccoli.  Weird thing is, we were talking about peppers. Go figure.

***

Wordless Wednesday: Orange You Glad It Was Just a Storm?

Just Another Night Where Someone Loses An Eye But No One Does Anything About It

Last night around 11 or so, I came downstairs to tell B a few things:

B: What's up?

Me: I have a list of things I have to say...

B: Are they about Black Swan?

Me: We could start there. That movie was stupid. Stupid! Maybe it didn't help that I had an idea of what was happening the whole time, even though I still don't know what happened.  Or that I knew the ending. But it was STUPID! I just wasted one hour and 48  minutes of my life when I could have been watching my DVR.

Me: Speaking of DVR, Franklin & Bash is FUNNY.

B: You watch Franklin & Bash?

Me: YES! And it is FUNNY.  Really, how could you go wrong with the comedic timing of Breckin Meyer and John Paul Gosselar.

B: Mark-Paul

Me: What?

B: His name is Mark-Paul not John Paul.

Me: John Paul sounds more French.

B: He is not French.

Me: Yes, he is. I looked it up. French Canadian.*

B: You looked him up and you still don't know his name?

Me: Whatever? Next up. My butt hurts like I walked many miles in it but really it is just from sitting on my ass. I don't know if that is sad or awesome so I am going with awesome.

Me: Also, I had a dream last night that Chester lost an eyeball. He scooted into the room holding it out to me. I alternated between screaming AHHHHHHHHH and saying "it will be okay Chester."  Guess who didn't come to help me although he was in the next room? That's right! You!  OUR CAT HAD NO EYEBALL. NO EYEBALL!!!

B:  Going to bed?

Me: Yep.

B: Night.

Me: Night.

/scene

*Actually he is not French or Canadian or even French Canadian. He was born to a Dutch born father and an Indonesian born mother. What up with the hypenated French sounding name parents? Way to confuse someone who is only half paying attention.**

**Yes, I had to go look that up. Again!

Wordless Wednesday: Everyone Needs a Shoulder to Lean On

Ramblings of a Riddler...A Horn, Iced Tea and 1993.

I was driving behind a mini van when I noticed that the driver and the passenger are in some sort of argument. The driver gives the passenger a shove. Then, out of nowhere, the passenger whips out a huge musical horn (like a big band horn) and blows it at the driver. Because it is so big, though, it is really blowing in front of his face and not by his ear. Just like that it is gone. Where did it go? Where did it come from? Was I seeing things?

***

I was so hot after the walking house tour this year that I decided I needed two Starbucks iced teas. Since they were both for me, I just got one straw. I met B at the car and told him I was glad he was there so it looked like I had bought him one, even though I hadn't.  We were driving off when I see B out of the corner of my eye pick up the tea to drink. Of course he has the one without a straw. Of course I watch to see what will happen. He tries to find the straw with his mouth three times before looking down and then looking at me and saying "How many times were you going to let me do that?"  Is forever a good answer?

***

I told B that I won my first win of June, a CD. He responded by saying "Way to win a prize from the past."  Yes, 1990 is supplying my prizes these days.

***

Wordless Wednesday: Friends or Foes?

Sunday Sweats: The Walk-In Closet Gets a Face Lift

When I told you about our walk-in closet here, I told you that we were not done with it. It was a beginning.  Now we are somewhere in the middle with our recent add-ons. Excuse the crappy iPhone pictures, I will take more quality pictures when I fill up the closet (can you say SHOPPING?).

Remember that by the closet door and window there was empty space? Not anymore.

There are shelves and a lower hanging bar near the closet door and shelves under the window. Now every wall is covered in some form of closet shelving/clothes bar unit.  Can you see the "real" closet door peeking out there on the right?

What you are looking at below used to be a ceiling to floor shoe rack as evidenced by the shelves that still have shoes on it. We added some drawers there as it was really the only place we could feasibly add drawers and I moved my shoes to the other ceiling to floor shelving unit.

When B asked me what other things I might be interested in, I did not ask for this. However, it is certainly something he needed and it is pretty cool.  A little organizational rack for belts in the area by his shirts (to the left of the window):

What I did ask for was a valet, or a pole that would pull out so I can hang the next day's outfit from it:

Like so:

It should be noted that I have only used that pole so far one other time. I am not that much of a planner. It should also be noted that B immediately said "why does this suit still have tags on it?"  Huh. 

Another thing I *had* to have was a hidden/retractable ironing board.  We had the regular ol' kind and I hated putting it up and taking it down every day or so, which meant that I inevitably just left it up in the middle of the room all the time which B *loved*.  So we got one that can disappear. Can you see it?

It pulls out and to the left like so:

Then you just pull the legs down and it is good to go:

My only minor complaint is that it is really half of an ironing board, but since I am not entering any ironing competitions, it seems to get the job done.

Another view point of the room:

See where those sweatshirts look like they are about to fall off the shelves to the right? That is because they are making way for my shoes. That is the unit where I moved all my shoes to. It is not because I am sloppy and cannot fold properly. Not at all.

Don't you just love it??

*UPDATE* I was just watching the show SuperNanny and saw that the Nanny was wearing that exact same suit that I hung to show off the valet. I mentioned this to B and he stated "it probably WAS that suit since you are not wearing." Whatever.

Roly Poly Bugs Have Nothing to Do with Watermelons

The other day when it was about a bazillion degrees out, I decided to eat some watermelon. Nothing odd about that, right? What was odd was when I looked to my left and a bug was running up to me. A water bug!  I decided that was hilariously clever and took to Twitter to tell the world about the irony of such events.

Then B came upstairs and I relayed the story to him.  His exact words? "Couldn't have been a water bug."  He was so definitive and stern. And so wrong. Why, yes it was a water bug, I KNOW WHAT A WATER BUG LOOKS LIKE, I GREW UP COLLECTING THEM! (Maybe I didn't tell him that last part as it sounds kind of serial killer like).  B was insistent and then informed me that waterbugs are really roaches and that landlords just call them that so people won't complain about them.

Then I lost my shit.

ROACHES? ARE YOU SAYING I JUST KILLED A ROACH? WE HAVE ROACHES? I GREW UP WITH ROACHES? I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THIS IS TRUE.

He tells me to Google it, so I do and I get this:

INSERT AWFUL IMAGE OF GROSS ROACH BUG HERE.

Seriously, I cannot even pick one for you to look at because they are all freaking me out.

Suffice it to say, that is NOT what I saw and NOT what I killed and most definitely NOT what I collected as an oddball child that might have serial killer tendencies but never killed anything.  What was I referring to? Well, as I said to B:

No, no, no.  My bug was like a roly poly type thing that rolls into a ball when you touch it.  I then googled "roly poly bug" and up came this:

source: flickr.com

Much cuter, right? People (other than me) collect them and give them playgrounds even:

source: toyreport.org

Nobody needs to use their imaginations these days. Geesh!  Also, I no longer feel like the biggest used to be nerd kid.

While I am relieved to note I do not have roaches, it kind of makes the whole watermelon story a lot less ironic, doesn't it?

Also? I write about bugs a lot.

It's Summertime and the Sprinkling's Easy

Is it hot enough for you? Don't you hate when people ask that? But they all do. It is like the easy button of small talk.  Anyway, it has been hot here the past couple of days. It started on Saturday, the day of our annual walking tour. It was so hot, I didn't even bother taking pictures.  Check out pictures from a prior year here and here.  Same type of houses, same type of heat.

When we got back, B decided he was going to water the dogs. Literally.  He broke out the sprinkler, which Jersey loves.  It was Nevada's first time.  Luckily, B had the camera at the ready and captured some fun moments:

How does this work?

Where does it come from?

Where does it go?

Oh there! In my face.

If I turn quickly I can catch it.

Maybe I should just contort.

Jersey lets Nevada know she has it under control.

A sprinkler challenge!

And a face-off!

Mid-shake fest.

My name is Nevada and I am FEROCIOUS!

The rest of us humans just showered and took naps. A perfect summer day.

Can you believe it is summer already?