Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Of Birthdays, Gas Cans and Limited Internet

I have to hurry up and write this post because B has informed me that he wants to get on the internet "soon" and our router is broke so only one of us can be on at a time. What kind of shit is that? And it was my birthday yesterday. So technically this is my birthday week and I should have ALL of the internet time I want, but apparently not.

So I know you are thinking I probably had a magical birthday filled with laughter, presents, sleeping in and cupcakes. Alas, that is not true. Although I often fancy that is the life I lead, in reality my birthday was like any other day save a few things.

First, unlike my friend who works for the county and gets her birthday off as a HOLIDAY, I had to go to the office. The plan was to leave early. I also went in late because, face it, if you can't sleep in a little on your birthday, when can you? (P.S. the answer is all of the other days this week and last. I seem to have a problem).

My one colleague and I had a meeting at noon so off we went. Before we left, however, we planned on going to lunch after and even planned the place and exactly what we were having. We were already starving. As the meeting finished, I looked down and saw that the office called. Then the office called my colleague. Another colleague was stranded on the freeway because her car ran out of gas.

I repeat - her car ran out of gas. On.The.Freeway.

She is in her late 40s. Too old to run out of gas. Too old to run out of gas four times in the last six months. So, yes, we had to go rescue her. No, she was not nearby. Yes, she called us 18 times during the drive to keep us updated. No, I was not amused. By then we were RAVISHED. When my colleague asked her how this happened she thanked us for coming but then told us not to ask anything else because she was cranky.

I WAS CRANKY. And starving. Sigh.

I ate lunch at 2:00. I left the office at 4:00. Least productive day ever and it wasn't even that fun. On a side note, I texted B when we were on the side of the freeway and my two cohorts were messing around with the gas can.* He responded with "at least you know your way around a gas can. Smart ass.

Two weeks ago, I decided to go fill up my tank. I took Jersey for the ride because B was mowing the lawn and she was playing chicken with the mower. B insisted that I fill up the gas can for the mower. He quickly showed me how to open it and sent me on my way.

Yeah, I couldn't open it when I got there. I drove back home, told him, listened to him sigh, then he opened it and MADE ME GO BACK. Jersey and I were not amused. Later he told me that he would never come rescue me if I were out of gas. I just laughed and told him I would find some man to do it. He responded with:

"Oh, like today."

I didn't even try, mister. I didn't even try.

*No, I did not get out of the car to assist with the gas can. I told them it was too dangerous as my side was on the traffic side. Later my one colleague told everyone that I said "I'm not getting out to do shit." I didn't say that, but it sure does sound like me.

5 important things being said:

j'lynn said...

I totally suck...Happy Birthday D!!! Maybe next year when I'm not consumed with finals I will remember your b-day....probably not, but it is the thought that counts, right?!? ;) Love ya girl!

Jamie said...

Happy belated Birthday! It has been five minutes since I read this post and I'm still pissed at the woman who ran out of gas. Unless the gas gauge is broken, there is simply no excuse. Get you lazy a$$ out of the car or pay extra for full service. It might be my hormones though. Hope your birthday was awesome.

Katelin said...

happy belated birthday but boo to all of that car trouble, that is lame! but yay april birthdays, woo!

Andhari said...

Happy belated birthday. I would be really upset too if I were you, starving and have to pick someone up in the FREEWAY of all places.

*~Dani~* said...

jlynn - no worries. I forget people's birthdays all the time. Maybe next year we will go out and actually celebrate both our bdays!

Jamie - Thank you for the birthday wishes. Also, thank you for the pissed off rage on my behalf. Aside from that issue, my birthday was pretty good. Also, as a side note? We have the same car manufacturer. It dings at you when you have 50 miles to empty and again at 25. Yes, I let it go to 25 but I did not run out of gas, nor did I employ my friends, family or coworkers to assist me in obtaining more gas.

katelin - April birthdays rock, girl! Happy Bday back at you. Yeah, it is almost June. I am slow.

Andhari - thanks, girl. I was upset and starving. Hell, I am starving right now just thinking about it!

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