Friday, January 09, 2009

My Momma Raps

Well not literally, but apparently she likes rap? Who knew? Not I. 

You see, I am the holder of all iTunes in my family. I was the first to embrace this wonderful technology and then, later, convinced my Mom to get on board. We both got iPods and I downloaded music for her and put it on her iPod, got her a docking system and she was off and running. And even though I downloaded iTunes on to her computer, I always download the music at my house and then just update her iPod. It is easier that way, especially with her current computer woes (p.s. anyone a Vista whiz out there? Seriously...). Because I am the downloader, I have my Mom tell me what songs she wants and, in turn, she shares the iTunes gift cards that she wins with me (which are a lot). Mom has rather good taste in music. We share a similar liking for many songs and artists, with the exception of some of her country music. You would be surprised how hip and current my Mom is. Apparently, as I found out, maybe TOO hip and current.

One day when I was over at my Mom's house my brother informed me that I need to download the SWEENG* song for my Mom. I had no idea what he was talking about and he could provide no further detail for me other than that one word, pronounced like that. He said he really got Mom into that song and that she would sing and dance, or maybe just laugh. I cannot remember. I listened, processed and forgot because I really had no idea what song he was talking about. 

Until today.

You see, I am kind of a satellite radio snob ever since it came installed in my car. I only like to listen to certain stations, with certain music and I am happy because there are no real DJs and no commercials. It is driving music nirvana. Having said that, it means that I really do not get to hear the latest craze in music unless it falls into my preselected genre. SWEENG apparently did not.

But I was driving B's car because mine is in the shop. B does not have satellite radio. He should be sad but he is not. Maybe because he has heated leather seats and I don't. But I digress...

Driving back to the office from lunch I hear a song with a catchy beat** and then what to my wondering ears did I hear? SWEENG. And what song would this be?

Swing by Savage featuring Soulja

What? By who? Soulja? Is that slang for soldier? Probably. What does that have to do with the song? Not sure. I think the song is about looking for a woman with some loose hips for some loose times***. In that case, perhaps he is a soldier of love? Or is he talking about his "little" soldier? Wait!!


I cannot believe she is listening to this music. And dancing and singing or laughing to it.

My Mom has so out-hipped**** me.

Not fair.

I'm telling Dad.

*I typed that exactly as my brother pronounced it, including the huge emphasis and seemingly yelling of the word.

**Not sure "catchy beat" is a common phrase that applies to rap music. Probably more like "sweet hook" or something. But what do I know? I am not hip.

***Now I am totally showing how un-hip I am with "loose times".  It is like I was transported back to the 1950s.

****A word I made up. And it has nothing to do with our figures.

*****This last footnote is just to see if you are still reading.

8 important things being said:

phishez said...

Um. Ew. Does she know what it means to 'superman that ho'?

After some 'special intimate time' the male of the species deposits his hand made glue on the ladies back as she sleeps. And then proceeds to tuck her in.

Once the 'glue' dries it sticks the sheet to the special ladies back, and it appears like a superhero cape.

Hence - she has been 'supermaned'.

Will she still listen to that song if she knows that?

*~Dani~* said...

phishez - um, ew gross right back at ya. I didn't even know what "superman that ho" meant" so I am sure she does not either. Honestly, I think it was the catchy SWEENG that drew her in. Now I have to go back and edit my post to correct the song after googling it. Should have done my homework.

Bloggers Bro J to tha O to tha N said...

I have been enlightened, thanks phishez. Please ignore any future hate mail from my girlfriend for the knowledge you shared. I had thought something else, referencing the way superman flies arm out fist closed...enough said I guess.
We missed out big time. Savage played at Club 22 late last month. I asked mom if she would attend( it was only $20). She told me that "I cant be up in that clizzup less Im rollin 10 deep. Lots a hatas wanna unload on me cuz they cant BE me! Dont wanna havta act tha fool up in der while im on parole"

*~Dani~* said...

Bro - um, I think what you have described has an actual name and the name is actually contained in your description. But since moms read this blog, I am going to pretend I dont know what you are talking about.

Oh, and love the rap lyrics! Maybe you should think about that as a side gig...

Captain Smack said...

Can you please provide a link to your mom's blog? I mean, you're great and all, but she sounds really cool.

Oh, and I just happen to be kind of a wiz with Vista. There is a way to fix all Vista-related problems at once. Just follow this step-by-step tutorial:

Step 1: Uninstall Windows Vista
Step 2: Install Windows XP
Step 3: There actually is no step 3, I'm just a little OCD about doing things in groups of 3.

*~Dani~* said...

Captain - my mom is cool and funny but she does not blog. Thanks for attempting to ditch me for another on the second post you have read.

I think my solution for the Vista problem will also be threefold:

1. Get hammer.
2. Smash computer.
3. Buy another computer, preferably a Mac.

Problem solved, but pricey. Alas, my cry for help.

Jennifer said...

Wow. I am so out of the loop. I have never hear of that song. As for phishez, that is very interesting and something I would not have know had it not been for you. For that, I thank you.

And what is this mention of Club 22? Have you all ever been? I am ashamed to admit that I have been there. Not for Savage though. What disturbs me most about that place is that it is on the corner of 21 mile. Not 22 mile.

*~Dani~* said...

Jenny - never been to Club 22 and have never even heard of it. Apparently my bro is more hip than I too, but at least he is younger. Perhaps the same people at my dealership are the people that named the club? That would explaina lot.

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